Fear, Goals, and 3 Year Olds

My husband is the loudest tucker-inner ever.


My husband re-tucks our kids in bed every night and I love it. It also terrifies me every time. He opens the door like he is on a mission and I swear our neighbors can hear the twist of the doorknob it is so loud. He walks quickly to each bed and yanks the twisted blankies from under our passed out kiddos and re-tucks them in safe and sound. They never wake up.

The entire time my stomach is in knots waiting for the dreaded, “Mommmmmy!”. 

He travels a lot for work and so when I am on tuck in duty, the scenario plays out in a very different way. I spend at least 5 minutes deciding whether or not I will actually go in there and re-tuck them in because they might wake up and cry and not go back to sleep for a long time if I do. I get ready for bed and decide to not go in there. I don’t want to risk it. I get in bed and then start to feel guilty for not tucking them in and so I get out of bed and tip-toe into their room terrified I will disturb them. I am concentrating so hard on not making a sound that I inevitably slam into something that makes a loud noise. And then they wake up. Shit.

Here is the difference between my husband’s approach and mine: Definiteness of purpose and fearlessness. 

My hubby has a job to get done and does it. I rehearse 25 different scenarios of what could go wrong and how I will deal with the aftermath. I paralyze myself with all of the negative possibilities and then finally make a decision to take action that is based on guilt. This results in me creating the exact negative experience I was trying to avoid.

What I have learned from this is that if you have a goal, you need to take immediate action. Don’t worry about the “what’s ifs”. There is no wrong step. There is only the next step. You can course correct, if needed, after you take immediate action. Don’t tip-toe towards your goals. Trepidation is the enemy of life satisfaction. 

What do you want right now? What fear is holding you back from taking action today? Go ahead and take the first tiniest step. I promise it will not be as painful as hearing that 3 year old cry out for you when all you really want is to go to sleep.



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